


We'll Never Know The Good Life

by Heyashes



Category: Captain America - All Media Types
Genre: 1940s, Forced Marriage, Late Night Conversations, M/M, Mild Angst, Pre-Serum Steve Rogers, Secret Relationship, Short, Song Lyrics, Songfic, Unbeta'd, Wishful Thinking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-14
Updated: 2015-09-14
Packaged: 2018-04-20 20:35:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 672
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4801400
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Heyashes/pseuds/Heyashes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bucky's unhappy marriage is tearing him apart and Steve wishes things were different.</p>
            </blockquote>





	We'll Never Know The Good Life

**Author's Note:**

> Oh god, it's been ages since I've written something. It's past one AM and I've written this in 20 minutes straight after thinking about it all day long.  
> It's terribly short but. Eh.
> 
> A good part of the dialogues as well as the title come from the song "[Good Wife](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BuqpMYAUJE0)" by Mika, and I strongly suggest you listen to it before you read it because A. it's totally worth it and I most definitely picture them having this kind of conversation and B. it'll help you get into the right mindset.
> 
> That being said I still can't find a beta reader and I'm not a native speaker, so suggestions and corrections (as well as volunteers for beta work) are warmly welcomed. I hope you enjoy and let me know if you'd like to read more from me.
> 
> All the love xx

It’s dark and rainy outside, like every October night in Brooklyn.  
The air in Steve’s tiny apartment is warm and sticky, tho, thick with the smell of sex and whiskey.  
Bucky’s body weighs against his side, his skin hot and slick with drying sweat.  
“Man, she stresses me out,” He slurs takin another swig from the nearly empty bottle. He hums and sets it down. Steve keeps quiet, listens. “She said she’s going to grab the kid and leave if I don’t find some better job. Hell, if she only knew I never wanted to end up with her to begin with,”  
Steve frowns, rolls onto his side to give him a better look. “You could’ve just said no,”  
Bucky laughs throwing his head back. A raw, bitter cackle. “You know my ma’, Stevie. No messing with that woman. When she says something, that’s gonna be it. No room for arguments,”  
“But it’s your life,” Steve argues running a hand through his tousled hair. “No one should have to marry someone they don’t love just because it’s the right thing to do,”  
“And what was I supposed to say? Two guys sharing an apartment, none of them settled down… would’ve been a bit suspicious, don’t you think?”  
Steve looks down, rolling his lips inward in a disappointed expression. “If it was me,” He starts, then raises his glance to meet Bucky’s heavy lidded eyes. “If it was me I would be a good wife,” He says, ignoring the amused look on the other’s face. “I mean it. We would be good. We’d have a good life, better than many’s,”  
Bucky rolls his eyes and clumsily pats Steve’s shoulder. “It's not that easy, Stevie. I-“  
“I would never doubt you,” Steve interrupts, because now that he’s took off the lid of the heavy box he’s felt sitting in the middle of his chest for so many years now he’s not going to stop. “I would never stress you, I wouldn’t care about how much money you took home.” And it makes him angry, painfully so, to think that someone as good as Bucky had to end up with someone as Rose. That he even had to have a daughter with her, as a memento that he’s never going to really get her out of his life.  
“We’ll have to wait another life for that,” Bucky replies with a sigh, his mouth a thin line as he stares at the cracked ceiling. “It’s better off this way. Nobody suspects a thing: we’re just two friends, nothing risky about it,”  
Steve scoffs and rolls his eyes. “We’re not just good friends, Buck,”  
“We’re good friends who also happen to have a good time,” Bucky grins playfully elbowing his ribs, making Steve glare at him.  
“I mean it, Bucky. It’d be different if it was me,”  
“I know,”  
Steve sighs and flops onto his back using his skinny arms as a pillow. “If only God had wanted it…” He trails off. “I could love you simply,”  
Bucky yawns and hums as his eyes close. “I’m too tired for this kind of conversation, Stevie. Broke my back down at the docks all day,”   
“But doesn’t it bother you that we’ll get older and we will never know?”  
Bucky cracks an eye open and looks at him, brow raised in question. “We’ll never know what?”  
Steve shrugs and shakes his head slightly. “The good life. We’ll never know the good life,”  
Bucky keeps quiet then, staring at him as he nods slowly, bottom lip held tight between his teeth. “Let’s not talk about it,” He says then, gently grabbing Steve by the waist and pulling him closer. “Let’s get some sleep, yeah? I’m not going back tonight. Fuck it,” He mutters under his breath with a pained expression. “You can use my shoulder as a pillow,” He offers then.

Steve does as told and rests his head on Bucky’s bicep.

 

He dreams of a home, rings and breakfasts in bed, and two good friends sharing one last name.  
  



End file.
